New Domain
2006
May
Have a mint!
April
Oh - I nearly forgot! Abby had her BABY! Meet socks everyone.
March
"Yuck.”
February
"I have always been fascinated in how we see ourselves and how the world sees us, especially the differences.”
"Every day billions of lives are swirling around us, bumping - pushing - jabbing into us - creating a sort of wild dance...”
If it is possible for someone’s head to explode, mine will.
January
"Most people had to grow into their ears. I on the other hand, had to grow into my teeth...”
I was tagged by this bitch, and damn if I wasn’t avoiding posting in here. I was procrastobating so well, too.
The Child shoved his fingers in my face. “Feel my fingers...”
"Having the right marshmallow roasting apparatus was vital to the perfect roast...”
” Swifty grabbed the half a brick Dad used to prop open the tack room door and told Hagar to place it snugly inside the coyote pouch...”
” When I got the nerve to come back and face the ‘blankness’ I would stare for a while and then retreat again in defeat.”
"I love my balcony.”
"Tonsight Iwaz dtdrinking red winne and extraa cheezy dDroiteoes when all voe suddne my face went nubme.”
"Sometimes you lose some. And sometimes you lose some more...”
"Since the only resolution I’ve ever kept was to never make another resolution...”
2005
December
”... this woman has lived ninety years. This means thousands of years of photographs have...”
"My cowgirl roots grow so deep...”
"This earth shattering event changed the course of history...”
"When I was a kid, my dad and I would go to the local country market and plug a zillion quarters...”
"Lord, save us from your followers.”
"I blog from my bathtub. It is an art.”
"Road apples. Horse poop. Round droplets of digested grass. One would think something more desirable than animal feces would bring back a flood of delightful childhood memories for the average person. But then again, I have never claimed to be average...”
"Conversation earlier in a Yahoo Canasta lobby:”
"Conversation earlier this week:”
"My dear reader, I would like to tell you right now, that if you ever decide to steal a bump sign in the middle of the night, don’t do it in a black mini-skirt and stilettos. Instead, plan ahead. Wear...”
Miser is not a strong enough word to describe Mr. Big as exemplified by the following conversation recorded in The History of the Universe.
”...I have learned to gnaw until my tongue is texture of ground beef rather than have him turn the wretched sounds off, because he works longer, faster, and harder with the music of the dead playing...”
"Rain does not stop me very often from working my horses and they are all aware of this...”
"Imagine driving along in your Doge Ram pickup minding your own damn business, when out of the blue...”
November
Overheard in Emotional Vomit's Thanksgiving Day Kitchen:
"- eV spots a horse syringe in the medicine cabinet
“I HAVE AN IDEA!"”
”...I opened the door like any cowgirl would - wrapped in a blanket, standing barefoot in the middle of a pile of muddy boots...”
"The horses are particularly fond of the crisp air and become very spirited, and spooky...”
”...No doubt, a horse is the animal to own. Twelve hundred pounds of magnificent...”
”...but The Dog was very intent on finding out what it was, for he not only had his head cocked to one side, but he was spying down the hole with one eye wrinkled shut.”
”...Immediately, I discovered a soft indentation about the size of a golf ball on the back of my head. I am sure I had a flashback of my mother beating me with a hammer when I was a child but I can’t say for sure...”
”... My brother talks to himself in this strange high pitched Toadstool voice whenever he is out shopping alone...”
”... I am quite sure the janitor enjoyed a certain amount of secret pleasure by using the toilet bowl rag to clean the mirror, but when you are in the seventh grade you don’t think of these things...”
”... I attracted every desperate, viagra-taking, cheap cologne wearing, shirt unbuttoned to the naval Joey Buttafuoco with his phone number shaved into his chest hair; and when I was in relationsh*t, he always seemed to have issues… and warrants.”
Yay, another blog is born.
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